How Addiction Affects Family Members – Grief and Loss Counselling

Battling an addiction, whether substance abuse or otherwise, has a crippling effect on the addict as well as his/her family members and friends. Addiction can ruin a peaceful and loving home, turning it into a place filled with tension, conflict, and strain, creating short and long-term effects on family members’ mental health, and particularly, the psychological development of children in the household. The effects can be devastatingly widespread, impacting a family legally, financially, emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and physically, making it incredibly difficult to cope whether you’re a child, spouse, distant relative, or friend.

As a family member, there is an endless number of changes you might witness in the addict, from physical changes like loss of weight, hair, and teeth, to mental changes like labile moods and aberrant behaviors. You are witnessing someone you love go from an individual you once knew so well, to someone almost unrecognizable – that is a huge loss.

So what do we do now? Family members can seek grief and loss counselling from a professional counselor to help them understand addiction as a chronic disease, to learn what style of communication doesn’t work with an addict, to set strong boundaries with the addiction in order to support the addict, and to grieve all of the losses that they have experienced through living with an addict.

The Impact of Family Addiction on Children

Children who grow up in a home ruled by addiction are more likely to develop an addiction in their adulthood. Experiencing the strain and pain of living with an addict, could cause deep psychological effects and trauma. These children are also more likely to be neglected and physically/emotionally/mentally abused, creating feelings of low self-worth and loss of safety. This may go on to affect them in their adulthood in so many ways if this trauma is not processed.

Addiction is a Brain Disease

Addiction is a chronic brain disease, and like any other chronic disease, it needs to be managed by professionals. As a family member in the addict’s life, we need to support the addict with unconditional love and treat the addiction with strong boundaries. Taking over the addict’s responsibilities is enabling them to fulfill their own responsibility and not to see the consequences of the addiction in their life – it “softens their blow”, preventing them from feeling the pain of the addiction, one of the only things that can drive the addict toward seeking sobriety.

Along with specialized addiction treatment, grief, and loss counselling should be implemented into the healing journey. While the addict is struggling with a loss of identity, those around them are struggling with the loss of the person they once knew.

If you need guidance, please don’t hesitate to get in touch with me. My grief and loss counselling service is aimed at helping you take the first steps towards emotional wellness.